Day 8: You Are Not Your Past

Hello, friends.

When I first thought about writing this 10-day journey, my mind immediately said:, “No way, Rose!” (Do not worry... “No way, Rose!” is simply a funny expression.)

The funny thing is that my mind almost convinced me not to do it.

For weeks, I questioned whether I had anything worth sharing. I doubted myself. I overthought every sentence before it was even written. Then I remembered what we talked about yesterday.

Not every thought is true!

So... Here I am... Writing Day Eight!! 😄

And I have to tell you... This journey has surprised me.

Every day I sit down to write, I discover something new about myself. Sometimes it is a beautiful memory. Sometimes it is a lesson I had forgotten. Sometimes it is a part of my heart that is still quietly asking to heal.

Today, I am not sitting in my garden. I am visiting a very special friend. Her backyard looks very different from mine, yet it offers me the same gift—a quiet place to reflect.

Well... At least until everyone arrives and our children jump into the pool!

As I sat here, my thoughts slowly wandered back through the years. To the fears. To the disappointments. To the traumas I carried with me for so long.

Looking back now, I realize I had been carrying them inside an invisible backpack. Oddly enough, that backpack had become my comfort blanket. Not because it made me happy, but because it had become familiar.

Whenever life became difficult, I reached into that backpack without even realizing it.

A few years ago, during an online therapy session with a Brazilian counsellor, she said something that completely challenged the way I saw myself.

“Your traumas are part of your story. They are not your identity.”

To be honest... I did not like hearing that at all.

I remember thinking, “How can she say that?” I t simply did not make sense to me. In fact, I was very upset.

But something interesting happened... Her words refused to leave me! Month after month... Year after year... They quietly stayed with me until I was finally ready to understand them.

Slowly, I began unpacking that invisible backpack. I was not throwing it away, not pretending those experiences had never happened. I was simply taking things out one by one, looking at them with compassion, and realizing that I no longer needed to carry everything everywhere I went.

Of course I will always miss my mother and all the people I lost in my life.

Of course there will always be questions about my childhood.

Those memories are part of me. They always will be.

But they no longer define me.

I no longer need to prove that I am worthy. I no longer need to be the perfect little girl to earn love.

Today, I choose who I want to be!! I choose kindness. I choose courage. I choose compassion. I choose to work hard for my dreams. Not because of my past... But because those are the values I want to live by!

One of the most beautiful things I have discovered is that when we stop seeing ourselves only through our wounds, something begins to change.

We become a little kinder to ourselves. We begin to recognize strengths we could not see before. We make room for healthier relationships, for hope, for joy, and for possibilities we may once have believed were not meant for us.

At some point, I realized I was spending so much time looking back at what had happened to me that I was forgetting to look ahead.

Instead, I began asking myself a different question: “Who do I want to become from here?”

And suddenly, the possibilities felt enormous.

Even though my past is part of my story, it does not need to hold me back anymore.

That does not erase my past. It honors it!

------------------------------------------------ 🌿 Before We Meet Again Tomorrow...

Today, take a moment to think about something you have been carrying for a long time.

Then gently ask yourself, “Am I carrying this because I still need it... or simply because it has become familiar?”

Perhaps today is the day to take one small thing out of your backpack. You do not have to leave it behind all at once. One gentle step is enough.

Your past has shaped your story, but It does not define who you are.

Thank you for walking this journey with me.

With love, Karem